Parenting as Two Mums and with a Disability with Jessica and Claudia
In this episode, Hannah is joined by Jessica and Claudia Kellgren-Fozard! Jessica is a YouTuber and content creator who shares her experiences as a chronically ill and disabled lesbian, often making videos with her wife, Claudia. Jessica discusses drawing on her knowledge of sign language as a deaf person to teach their baby, and how becoming a parent has helped Jessica with her disabilities through building physical strength. Jessica and Claudia chat about why Claudia had an elective caesarean to make it easier for Jessica to be able to be present at the birth and how the temporary disability of recovering from her caesarean gave Claudia a new perspective on the restrictions and frustrations Jessica experiences with her disabilities. They talk about how gender parenting roles don’t come into play as a lesbian couple, why not to say “whose baby is it really?” to lesbian parents, and how ostracising it can be for Jessica when “mum” gatherings focus on breast feeding. Finally, Jessica and Claudia chat to Hannah about whether they felt the health care environments they visited during the pregnancy were inclusive to them as lesbians
Read the episode transcript here!
What we chat about…
How has having disabilities impacted Jessica’s parenting? What have some of the benefits been?
Teaching their baby sign language
Benefits of teaching a baby sign language
Jessica relating to their baby’s difficulties learning how to do things for the first time
Has the baby helped Jessica’s disabilities in any way?
What was having an elective caesarean like? How did Claudia come to that decision?
Picking your child’s birthday
Navigating Claudia’s changing body and capabilities when normally Claudia is the abled partner in their inter-abled relationship
Did Claudia’s experience with pregnancy and recovering from her caesarean give her a different kind of insight into Jessica's experiences with with disability?
Gender roles and parenting in a lesbian relationship
People assuming Jessica gave birth to their baby because she’s the “girly” one
What not to say to lesbian parents
Have they felt excluded from mum/parenting spaces due to being disabled or also due to being two mums?
Jessica feeling ostracised from “mum” spaces when they’re focused on breastfeeding or birth experience
Is Jessica still getting the eight hours of sleep she needs now they have a baby?
Parenting night routines
Was the healthcare system around fertility, pregnancy, and birth inclusive to Jessica and Claudia as two women?
How do you deal with burnout, or just a lack of energy when parenting?
How does Jessica find the balance between being a mother with fatigue and multiple other disabilities?
Should all children should first learn basic sign languages because it's easier than speaking?
USEFUL LINKS
RESOURCES FOR LEARNING SIGN LANGUAGE WITH YOUR BABY
ASL:
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MORE ABOUT JESSICA KELLGREN-FOZARD
Jessica Kellgren-Fozard is a British Youtuber and Content Creator who shares her experiences as a chronically ill and disabled lesbian in a fun, uplifting and educational way. Since starting to make videos in 2016, Jessica's channel has grown to 902k subscribers and the success of her platform has led to her being named the top Online Influencer at the British LGBT Awards 2021. Jessica is an advocate for both the Disability and LGBTQ+ communities, often making videos with her wife Claudia, or about her daily experiences as a deaf person living with genetic disorders Hereditary Neuropathy with Liability to Pressure Palsies (HNPP) and Ehlers-Danlos Syndrome. Her amazing efforts in representing both communities have earned her places on the Shaw Trust Disability Power List and Lesbian Visibility Week’s Visible 100 List.
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*affiliate links