Queerness, Autism and Fan Fiction with Erin Ekins (Queerly Autistic)
In this episode, Hannah is joined by Erin Ekins, who is the author of Queerly Autistic: The Ultimate Guide for LGBTQIA+ Teens on the Spectrum. Erin discusses coming out as bisexual, being diagnosed with autism, and the combination of societal hypersexualization of bisexuality with the infantilization of autistic people. She and Hannah talk about the potential vulnerability of being autistic and the potential for abusive platonic or romantic relationships. They chat about Torchwood and how fandoms and fanfic can be a great way to explore your sexuality. Finally, Erin tells Hannah about the term "queerplatonic", gives advice for people in relationships with or friends with autistic people, and talks about the current poor state of research into autism.
CW: abusive relationships (12:00 - 17:29; 4 minutes 30 seconds) and suicide (30:46 -31:59, 1 minute and 13 seconds). These timestamps are without ads: you may or may not be served ads whilst listening to the episode which may change the time stamps. If you hear a section start and don’t want to listen, just skip ahead the length of the section to avoid it.
Read the episode transcript here!
SHOW NOTES
What we chat about…
Who Erin is and what she does
The hypersexualization of bisexuality
The infantilization of autistic people
What made Erin want to focus her book on being a guide for teens?
What does queerplatonic mean?
The societal relationship hierarchy idea of heterosexual romantic relationships being the ultimate goal
For Erin personally, how do her autism and her bisexuality come together?
Erin's advice for people also trying to navigate how their autism might make them vulnerable to abusive relationships
Red flags of abusive relationships
Making things more accessible improves things for everyone, not just disabled people specifically
Fan fiction
How Erin got started writing fan fiction
Phantom of the Opera phandom
Torchwood fandom and the Jack/Ianto relationship
How writing from Ianto's POV helped Erin realise she was bi
The community of queer women in the Torchwood fandom
Fandom as a safe place to explore gender identity through fanfiction and the community
Is there any understanding of why there's a higher percentage of queer autistic people than queer neurotypical people?
The poor and dehumanizing research into autism
A person's gender identity sometimes being tied into their autism
Autistic people and suicide rates
Autism research focusing on why autistic people exist rather than how to help them
What can people who are in relationships with or friends with autistic people do to help? What should they be aware of?
Clear communication styles
Noticing when someone is getting overwhelmed
Being open to hearing abut someone's interests
"Cringy" and cringe culture
Applied Behavioural Analysis therapy
Autistic people finding each other as friends
Open communication
Practicing saying what you mean rather than assuming someone will guess
Do you feel welcomed in a large LGBTQ+ community as an autistic person? (39:11)
Options for quieter queer spaces as well as Pride and clubs
What is the best way to explain puberty and support kids with autism through it? (44:05)
USEFUL LINKS
The Autism Friendly Guide to Periods* by Robyn Steward
MORE ABOUT ERIN EKINS
I am a queer, autistic woman who writes and advocates on issues surrounding being queer and autistic. I also work on wider disability justice and various other social justice topics. I have written for The Independent, Huck Magazine, and Neuroclastic, and have featured on Channel 4, The Victoria Derbyshire Show and BBC Radio 5 Live.
My first book, Queerly Autistic: The Ultimate Guide for LGBTQIA+ Teens on the Spectrum was released by Jessica Kingsley Publishers in 2021. I run a YouTube channel called Queerly Autistic, and you can also find me on Twitter as @QueerlyAutistic.
CONNECT WITH US
*affiliate links